Alternatives to Punishments and Rewards

I wanted to share some info from the Agile Learning Center training framework. I don't want to plagiarize, but I'm going to at least try to summarize some of the things I've been reading. I'd love to know what you think!

One section talks about gaining children's cooperation. They recommend avoiding blaming, calling names, threats, or giving orders. Hopefully we wouldn't usually blame kids (the examples were "Look what you did!" or "How dare you!") or call names... but I know that I've used threats ("Do this now or INSERT TERRIBLE CONSEQUENCE HERE!")and given orders. These ways don't really teach students anything... rather, they are attempts to control kids' behavior.

Here are some of the tactics they do recommend.

1. Describe what you see. "I see mud all over the floor in here!"

2. Say it with just one word. "Shoes!" (This would work best if students already knew the expectation, such as "Wipe your shoes" or "Take off your shoes at the door.")

3. Give information. "If we leave mud all over the floor, the custodian will have to clean up after us."

4. Describe how you feel. "When I see mud all over the floor, I feel worried that we're not taking good care of our space."

5. Offer a choice. "You can either take your shoes off at the door, or wipe them really well on the mat."

6. Write a note or make a sign. "Please wipe your feet! Please clean up any muddy footprints!"

7. Preteach, and get kids to verbally confirm by saying "okay." "It is muddy out today, so please wipe your feet when you come in, and wipe up any muddy footprints. Okay?" "Okay!"


They also have a section on problem solving that lists the steps for involving a child in working through his own behavior.

1. Listen to and acknowledge the child's feelings and needs. "You were frustrated that you couldn't get the supply box to close all the way."

2. Avoid criticism such as "You still shouldn't have broken it."

3. Sum up the child's perspective. "So, the problem was that the box wouldn't close all the way."

4. Briefly state your feelings or needs. "It upset me that you broke the supply box. It belongs to all of us. I need everyone to help take care of our things."

5. Invite the child to work on a solution with you. "Can we try to solve this problem together?"

6. Brainstorm and write down all ideas, without commenting. Let the child go first at coming up with ideas, if possible.

7. Decide together which ideas would work best, and which ideas wouldn't work so well.

8. Choose a plan that you both agree on. "You will bring a new supply box tomorrow, and next time you can ask someone for help if you are frustrated!"

9. Make it official by shaking hands or signing an agreement.

10. Revisit if necessary.

Any thoughts?